Thursday, January 10, 2019

31 Days To Self Love: Day 10

original challenge: Blessing Manifesting




"No one can make you feel inferior without you consent" - Eleanor Roosevelt.

Well gee thanks Eleanor. In this moment that just makes me feel like a big ole' dum dum. But ... it's true. I've spent decades (I almost chose another less dramatic word --- until i realized it's true) teaching people that it's okay to treat me, speak to me, expect from me, and think of me in a way that is not full of self love, respect, or heck even kindness. 

And guess who is at fault?

If you guessed me -- well then friend you and I are on the same page. 

I didn't grow up with a good example of what a healthy, respectful, romantic relationship was. My parents were never together, and the couples I was surrounded by, for the most part, were highly dysfunctional. 

I am a people pleaser to a fault. Wait... is there ever a scenario where people pleasing isn't to a fault? Is it ever a good thing? Hmmm... that is another topic I think I've dive into at some other time. 

Do you know what I've come to realize about why I allow others to cross the boundaries of poor treatment in my life?

It's really a no-brainer so I feel silly that it's taken me so long to figure it out and label it but here it goes: I (on a daily basis) cross my own boundaries too.  I talk down, left, right, up, and inside at myself .  I speak outloud, and inwardly, about how I'm not X,Y,Z. How my ____ isn't enough. How I look _____. Not smart enough. Not pretty enough. Not a good enough writer. Not a good enough mom. The liste could go on and on and  on. 

soooooo.... If i do that to myself.... how on earth could or should I expect more from other people?

This isn't a "Them" problem. This is a ME problem. One I am determined to get to the bottom of. 
I'm not sure where to start, but I think these daily prompts about self love is probably a pretty good place to begin. 

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